Sarah WallockI have been based in New Zealand for two years. Now I am transitioning back to the US. I thought I would share some of my funniest culture shock moments.
Culture shock. I know things are different abroad and people become accustomed to a certain way of life when living somewhere. I would like to think I’m not that out of touch with where I come from.
After returning home for the first time in two years from living abroad, it turns out I am very out of touch.
From a literal scream of joy when I saw IHOP to accidentally becoming overly picky with my coffee orders, there have been some unpredictable moments since returning home. That’s reverse culture shock. As I haven’t been completely off-the-grid the past two years, the transition has been pretty easy for the most part. But there have definitely been some moments that confused me…
Table of Contents:
Coffee Orders: Try, Try, Try Again
Grocery Shopping: Overwhelmed by Options
Driving: On the Wrong Side of the Road?
Getting Gas: How does this work again?
Tipping Culture: So… Where and When Do You Tip?
Single Use Plastics and Waste
Cultural References
Cultural Shock Moments
Coffee Orders: Try, Try, Try Again
Trigger warning: I am about to go into detail about three distinct coffee-tasting experiences. If this isn’t your thing, I would go ahead and skip to “Coffee Conclusion.”
Round 1: Vanilla Latte
My dad and I headed down to one of the hippest coffee shops in Santa Barbara. I used to always go there for a drink, sometimes with my laptop, and always enjoyed it. But Santa Barbara had changed and I had changed…
I used to get flat whites in New Zealand, espresso and a splash of milk (more coffee than milk is the key!). They don’t really have flat whites here. What was I supposed to order? Where was I? Stay cool, I told myself.
I felt like I was from Mars staring at the coffee menu. For some reason, all of my decision-making abilities had flown out the window, and thankfully, my dad walked back in. “Vanilla latte please,” I said more confidently than I felt.
After one sip, I knew I made a big mistake. It tasted like sugary vanilla milk. I think they forgot the actual coffee? It was truly one of the worst coffee drinks I have ever tasted, but I think I was the problem, not the drink…
My expectations were simply out of whack. So I did what all coffee-lovers would do, and try again at another coffee shop.
Round 2: Cappuccino
For round 2 I was nervous, but felt much more confident that I wouldn’t order a sugary disaster. Yet, I still had my tail between my legs when ordering. Foreign, confused and a little bit deluded.
A cappuccino has less milk, so it cannot be a sugary wreck! Great, sweet here we go!
When my cappuccino arrived, there was a mountain of foam on top. Okay… I thought. Once I get through this minor foamy inconvenience, I will be able to enjoy my coffee blissfully. Alright, a cappuccino is a step in the right direction, I was thinking.
But man, I would never order a cappuccino again.
At least this time I was remembering some of my social skills such as waiting for the drink to be called and then retrieving my it. The day before I had been chased by the grumpy barista holding my drink because I failed to wait at the pickup station.
Round 3: Americano
Damn, third time’s the charm they say. Wanting to make the least complicated order, I was already against the idea of the Americano. Espresso, hot water. Boom, done. But what type of drink is like a flat white? With a little espresso and a little milk to make it less bitter and more sweet? Turns out, nothing I can find…
So here it goes, “Can I please get an Americano with a dash of oat milk?”
This time, I was a seasoned professional. Place order. Go to to-go counter. Don’t expect your name to be called, you aren’t a celebrity. Remember your order, they’ll call that. Grab drink. Go outside. Try your best to enjoy.
I opened the lid to my Americano and woah it looked like something much more familiar! The experience wasn’t as miserable as the first two try’s. Cheers to trying new things, but I would not be ordering an Americano again either.
Round 4: Wait for it… FLAT WHITE
Devon took me to Beacon coffee shop out in Ojai, an hour from my house, and I had a good feeling from the start. Right as I walked in, my eyes immediately saw: FLAT WHITE in large letters on the hipster chalkboard. This has to be the one… I thought.
Devon and I cheers’d our flat whites, grabbed gluten free chocolate scones and picnicked in the park.
WOW that was some delicious coffee. It’s not that the coffee was just delicious but it took me back to New Zealand. I was walking by the lake with a warm drink. Or I was grabbing a coffee in a hurried rush to go up snowboarding. I was running out to meet a friend for a cuppa.
I will full-heartedly drive 1 hour out to Ojai again for this drink.
Coffee Conclusion
What I found out is that, like many things in life, coffee is all about quality over quantity. High quality coffee beans, less water, less milk, smaller cup = better cup of coffee. In the US, there’s an obsession with bigger = better, but in relation to coffee, I can confidently tell you bigger doesn’t equal better. If any of my friends from NZ come over please bring me AllPress.
Grocery Shopping: Overwhelmed by Options
I went into Trader Joe’s not knowing what or who I would encounter. The grocery store has probably been the most extreme instance of culture shock. Dang there was a lot of food! The diversity of the offerings, the range in quality and truly the amount of options overwhelmed me. I wanted to explore the store but I also wanted to hide in the car and not deal with the overstimulation.
In New Zealand, there was choice, albeit limited, but still choice. But this was next-level.
What shocked me even more than the variety of offerings was the price. Everything was insanely affordable compared to NZ prices. I went through my entire shopping bag three different times for three different audiences to catalog the amount saved in USD on groceries. I was cheering all over again!
A few examples: Kimchi was $3 USD ($14 NZD), basil was $3 ($15 NZD), and almond butter was $7 ($11 NZD).
My first grocery shop 
PB Cups are $1 in the US but one goes for $5 in NZ
Driving: On the Wrong Side of the Road?
I was a bit skeptical to go back to driving on the right side of the road. Apparently, my transition to driving on the left in NZ was slightly traumatic for my coach and passenger, Nick. I hoped this wouldn’t be the same here.
I first drove with my dad in the car, and it went smoothly. After about three more trips in the car I was confident again.
The road rules are also different so I had to do a lot of on-the-spot re-learning to become accustomed to being in the US.
Getting Gas: How does this work again?
When I drove up to the gas station alone, I felt a little bit shocked. I usually pay around $90 NZD for a tank of gas in my Mitsubishi Chariot in NZ.
Devon’s car, of the relatively same size, cost $30 USD to fill.
Even after adjusting for the exchange rate, gas is still much cheaper in California than in NZ.
Tipping Culture: So… Where and When Do You Tip?
I went to the famous Mony’s to grab some tacos with my mom and we were prompted to “add tip” at the end of the payment. The few times I had seen tip options in NZ were at tourist establishments catering to Americans. Tipping is not part of the NZ culture.
I have become so used to not tipping that I asked my mom to help describe a list of places I would and wouldn’t tip. After each of these culture shock moments I’ve described above, I also send an immediate text to my friends for cultural tips. Tip: sit down meals, hairdressers, service workers, delivery drivers, hotel workers, taxis etc. Don’t tip: to-go pickup orders, coffee.
Honestly because I am so out of practice, I will need to rely on my surroundings for the next few months to get used to tipping culture. I remember even before I left I was still confused on where to or where not to tip.
Single Use Plastics and Waste
I am appalled by the amount of waste and single use plastics I have encountered since setting foot in California. It really upsets me that Californian culture is deemed “progressive” when generally, environmentally, the US is lightyears behind many other countries.
There are so many plastic bags and containers and lots of unnecessary packaging and waste. Due to Covid, this has been especially bad because “bring your own” cup or reusable bag programs have been suspended. But man, there is SO MUCH work that needs to be done in this category.
Cultural References
From TikTok to reality TV, I thought I was pretty in-the-know. Again, turns out, not so much. I tried my best to integrate into the culture in New Zealand and Queenstown to the best of my ability. Because of this, I think I missed out on a lot of common cultural references. And, a huge part of me just is not inclined to catch up or ask about what I have missed.
I could tell you a litany of random facts about New Zealand geography, history and birdlife, but if you wanted to talk American pop culture, I am probably not your girl.
Culture Shock Moments
All in all, I haven’t experienced very big moments of culture shock. I was pretty stoked about the massive container of basil, but I guess the most shocking part is how unexpected the moments are. Each time I go out I can assume everything will be pretty normal. But, I’m still having waves of excitement and confusion.
