Sarah WallockIn when plans go awry part one, I examine and discuss the major surprise that hit my study abroad group when our homestay organization canceled our stays in Hoi An Vietnam, leaving us with no accommodation and no plan! What drama, plans go awry for kids who are spending three months of their young lives living in foreign countries, a thing most people in the world never have a chance to do! The homestays were supposed to be the basis of our Vietnam experience and the central location for our time there. Now I write from New Zealand, with another canceled homestay, (this time I had to cancel it myself) and it all feels eerily similar. It was in Vietnam and is now in New Zealand, definitely upsetting at the time, but in the grand scheme of things, a very small incident. More on why I left my homestay after 24 hours later, but first, how did I get here? Let’s go back to the beginning: March 2019.
In March, Nick and I hit the ground running with our visas. If we’re doing this, we have to scout out how difficult or easy it would be to secure jobs and we definitely want a life together- one place, good jobs, an staying for extended period of time, in contrast to the long-distance relationship before. Dylan, our good friend from our summer job in California, who is also a Kiwi, sent us a detailed explanation of how to get visas and how long they’d last for each of our nationalities. Nick and I started scrolling through prospective opportunities if we were to move to NZ. The first opportunity we found was through Workaway and it seemed perfect. We would be working for a rock-climbing company, helping around a farm, and we’d be getting paid! Not a bad deal at all. Within one message, we were connected to someone across the world and we seemed to have a ton in common. Our plan was set. Every time anyone asked us what we were looking forward to most it was this 3-month summer job we had secured 6-months in advance of our arrival. We had it all figured out!
Next, I reached out to some hostels- just to say hey, introduce myself and keep us in their contacts if anything happened to open up right when we arrived. Before our summer job started in October, we had 2-months free at the beginning of our visa. This worked wonderfully. Ultimately, we got all sorted to work for our first two-months in New Zealand at a hostel, which turned out really well. A few days after we arrived in NZ, we had 5-months of free accommodation and jobs all sorted. It felt so stable and reliable, almost too good to be true. And with having Dylan’s family in Auckland, we always had a place to crash, an offer we frequently took-up.
Fast-forward two-months into our time in NZ, which was earlier this week, we were very excited to start our new opportunity at the rock-climbing place and leave the hostel. We drove back towards Auckland and eagerly, yet confidently, navigated to our Workaway opportunity. There was not a doubt in my mind about if it would be the right fit because it sounded so perfect on paper. This is a prime example of when something you’ve premeditated, is very different in actuality. From the moment we arrived, something didn’t feel right.
The couple took us on a tour of their house, which was beautiful, and their farm, which had incredible rolling hills and livestock. They lived 20-25 minutes to the nearest town and we kept re-discovering how remote their area was. On the tour of the house, they mentioned their water heater was broken, which is the last thing you want to hear when working on a farm. Therefore, we wouldn’t be able to shower for a week. As for baths, everyone in the house would have share bathwater. For example: the lady would bathe, I would bathe, Nick would bathe, then someone else, then someone else- all recycling the same lukewarm, dirty water. I don’t know if this is concerning, but when she first presented me with this idea I was totally down. You’re in a different country, in someone else’s home, just go with it, the voice in my head was saying. But later, with my body covered in cow shit and dirt, I thought about the absolute absurdity of that request. Nick, on the other hand, from the beginning, was thinking “let’s get the hell out of here.” His face went from happy-go-lucky to emotionless very quickly after arrival. We drove 30 minutes to town and used a free trial at a gym, just to take a shower in a windowless stall.
Throughout the 24 hours, we got into a series of strange conversations that they initiated about gun-control, terrorism, and politics, not any get-to-know-you conversations. Actually, I wouldn’t say they were conversations, more them declaring their views to us and not really caring what our opinions were, as they seemed to be set in their ways. It didn’t exactly feel comfortable or like home. There were so many strange things that didn’t add up. I asked for the Wifi password, this did not go well. They told me I was allowed to use Wifi for 15 minutes once a week to call my family, or I could drive 30 minutes to sit at a McDonald’s and use theirs. I don’t need to constantly surf the internet or stream Netflix, but I do run a website and strive to keep in contact with all my family and friends back in the U.S.
The place was full of contradictions: plenty of great online reviews, but such a strange lingering feel in person. Gorgeous home and farm, but strange house rules and unrealistic expectations of guests. Really comfortable and cute accommodation, but no hot water, limited water, rationed fruit portions, no wifi. I definitely doubt myself at times, but Nick and I were completely unanimous and so confident in our decision to leave. Being out of your comfort zone is so important, especially when traveling, but we had to trust our intuition. Knowing we had cost the family three months of employment that they would have to fill positions for, we agreed to stay for just the morning to complete the farm work. I spent the morning sweeping rat poop in a dark and dusty garage for 3 hours. Anytime I tried to make conversation with the Workaway host, they would dismiss or actively put-down whatever I was saying. I kept picturing myself anywhere else in the world, with an alcoholic beverage in hand. (Fortunately, this dream became a reality the later that day!).
Luckily, Dylan and his family were a twenty-minute drive away. After our morning on the farm, we drove down to Dylan’s as fast as possible and jumped in the well-deserved hot shower. Since coming back to Dylan’s house we’ve been making new memories like going to the local pub, watching the Rugby World Cup, cooking together, playing with the cats, and taking walks around Auckland. We love Dylan’s family and we’ve all gotten much closer since two months ago when we arrived. Tomorrow, we are heading down to Queenstown to settle and start anew.
My favorite experiences have happened while staying in homestays while traveling. For instance, I loved meeting my homestay mom and dad in Morocco, eating awesome tagines, and laughing all night with the biggest smile on my face. In Morocco, my homestay mom even sprayed vanilla on my pillow before bed each night. I loved visiting two of my best friends across the world- Caitlin for Christmas in Ireland and Caro for spring break in Mexico. Caitlin’s mom bought me a basket of gluten-free goodies and Caro’s mom invited me to join her birthday dinner celebration. I loved staying with my homestay family in Bolivia, going to parties, eating silpancho (SO GOOD), and improving my Spanish. My homestay mom in Bolivia even made me gluten-free silpancho- honestly, she’s an angel!
I have so much love in my heart for these homestay experiences. There is something so warm and welcoming about someone opening their home to you, which we thought would happen with this much-anticipated rock-climbing job. Yet, the dirty bathwater, weird political conversations, shoddy data and internet, and location (in the middle-of-nowhere), resulted in us running in the other direction, literally. The irony is: we signed up for a homestay, seeking an immersive and authentic New Zealand experience, when in actuality, staying with Dylan’s family was our genuine homestay experience all along.
